The Many Faces of Nathan

Nathan Turns 2

Nathan celebrated his 2nd birthday with his Ku Po whose birthday is a day earlier.

Guest of Honour who distributed the Christmas gifts was none other than the birthday boy.

For Po Po.

Sam Q, it's yours!

Aunti Jun, this is for you!

Paul Q, this' yours!

What about me?

All mine!

The Delusion of Little Hong Kong ?

Sandakan is one of the towns I hardly visit probably because I hardly have any project there. So when my lady engineer invited us to attend her pre-wedding banquet in Sandakan, we decided to make a driving tour to Sandakan.

Sandakan has made much progress as far as infrastructure is concerned. With the CM as the state assemblyman of Sungai Sibuga, an area close to Sandakan, it was obvious he has taken great effort in developing this area. In fact, his aim is to make Sandakan the education hub of Sabah.

Sadly, the town which was one time being fondly referred as  "Little Hong Kong" obviously is losing this identity fast because of the tremendous influx of "foreigners" of other ethnicity. When we decided to look for a traditional coffee shop for afternoon tea, we had great difficulty in finding one. We finally found one in a row of old shops situated close to the hill which is the original Sandakan town. As expected, all the shop assistants are non-Chinese including the boss who seems to be of mixed parentage (Not being racist - just making an observation!) All the shops in the area nearer to the seafront are practically run by non-Chinese. You feel like you are in Kelantan or Terengganu when you take a stroll in this city!

Fortunately, the stay was made pleasant when we had the chance to stay in the latest landmark hotel, Four Points by Sheraton Sandakan which indeed is very nice. The view at the 24th floor was fantastic.

We also took time to explore some of the well known tourist spots. The 1st spot we visited is Agnes Keith's old house which is built at a very strategic place on the hill overlooking the Sandakan town. Sabah owes much to Agnes Keith because of the phrase she coined for her book, "Land below the Wind".

Walking toward the Keith's old house

View of Sandakan From Keith's Old House

An old government quarter adjacent to Keith's old house was turned into a restaurant called "English Tea House & Restaurant". The scones served there was not bad!

We also visited the Sandakan War Memorial, a place where many Australians who still faithfully came year in year out to remember their dead heroes. This place should be kept in perpetuity to remind us of the atrocities committed by the Japanese and the evil of war.

On the way back, we also stopped by the roadside to look at a project we once did: The design and supervision of the remedial system for collapsed slopes by the highway. I was glad to see that it is still performing well after almost eight years!

Chapter 2: Bed Time Story - A Story I Never Forget

In the 1950'2 and 1960's, having electricity supply connected to residential dwellings by utility company is a rarity. My village house as well as the surrounding neighbouring houses which were at a mere 2 Km distance from the town centre did not have electricity. Electricity was only available to shop-houses in the town centre, institutional buildings and a few government quarters nearby.

For night time lighting, we depended on kerosene lantern, kerosene lamp and candles.

A typical kerosene lantern and a typical kerosene lamp.

In normal week days, we had dinner fairly early at around 6 pm to 6.30 pm just before darkness set in. The lantern would then be activated to enable us to do our home works and other house chores by my mother. My father normally came back just after 7 pm after his dinner in the work place. By 7.30 pm or latest 8 pm, we would have finished our home work and ready for bed. Occasionally, the three older boys would pester the mother for story. She was a good story teller and had told quite a number of stories though sometimes were repeats. Of all the stories told, there is one which is still very vividly stuck in my memory which I would never forget. She told us that the story was told to her by her father who came to North Borneo (now called Sabah) when he was a working adult.

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"A long long time ago in China, people were very poor. For a poor kid who wished to free himself from the cycle of poverty, the only way was to pass the government examination. Once a scholar passed the exam (Zhuang Yuan), he would be assured of a job as a governor or an administrator.

There was this poor scholar who lived in a faraway farmland. He studied very hard and later enrolled to sit for the government examination. The distance between his village where he stayed and the examination centre in the city was very far apart. To reach the examination centre, he had to set out a couple of days before the examination date and walk miles and miles along hardly identifiable trail in the jungle. There was hardly any sign of people along the trail. Occasionally, he took a break and rested in one of the dilapidated sheds built by the side of the trail by some kind people earlier.

One afternoon as he was walking, he found a centipede trapped under a fallen tree branch. The centipede had been struggling for quite some time to free itself but was unsuccessful. The poor scholar was kind-hearted and immediately lifted the tree branch and set the centipede free. Because of injury, the centipede could not move and the scholar decided to help it further. He carefully placed the centipede into a small empty container perforated with breathing holes. He then put some bread crumbs inside the container and then carried it with him along the way. He intended to set it free once the centipede had recovered.

After about two days, he observed that the centipede had recovered and he decided to set it free. Just then, he saw a very huge snake (the diameter of a steel bucket according to my mother) and it was moving fast toward him. He gathered all his belongings including the container containing the centipede and ran as fast as he could. Just when the snake was about to catch up, he saw a little hut and he quickly ran inside and locked the door. That was the only way to avoid being swallowed up by the huge snake.

He waited and waited inside the hut hoping the snake would move away. To his horror, he suddenly realized that instead of moving away, the snake began to wrap around the hut rendering the hut in total darkness and sealed up all air gaps on the wall. As time passed, the scholar began to sweat profusely and was about to die due to the lack of oxygen.

At that moment, he remembered the little centipede. He managed to open the container and poured out the centipede in darkness and said, "I am going to die, but you being so small should be able to find a little gap and craw out to safety. Go!". Then, he waited to die. Just before he lost total consciousness, he began to see light along the small cracks on the wall. He was able to catch his breath with fresh air coming in. He could hear sound of struggling outside the hut. When it was all quiet and after he regained his strength, he opened the door and went out. What he saw truly broke his heart!

He saw the huge snake lying dead with a centipede whose mouth was gripping tightly at the snake's throat.  The centipede was dead too. It was crushed to death by the snake as the latter rolled and twisted trying to break free from the centipede's bite.

The scholar was heart-broken and was very grateful to the centipede for sacrificing its life to save him. He placed the dead centipede inside the container and dig a hole and buried it. Before he moved on, he knelt and bowed three time to the grave of the centipede.

He later reached the examination centre. He sat for the examination which he passed later on. He was appointed as a government official and he performed his duties diligently and well."

After the story telling, there was total silence and we felt a deep sense of loss. As usual, the command came as soon as the story telling ended: "Here ends the story and it's time to go to bed !".

Though it is a simple story, the elements of rendering kindness in return for kindness received to the point of  sacrificing one's own life are life lessons that make this story truly extraordinary.

Post addition (18 May 2020): A video which I received does show that a centipede is able to kill a snake!

Chapter 1: Nicknames

When the idea of writing our childhood stories first mooted by Serene, the very first thing that came to mind is the gang of playmates I used to hang out with during our childhood days in the fifties and early sixties in the village.

Photo with courtesy from prweek.com

In those years, parents liked to think of all kinds of nicknames for their kids. We had a family in the village whose eldest son is called "Lap Chong" or Chinese sausage. The two youngest boys out of five siblings are nicknamed "Ah Tong" and "Ah Yam" which mean sugar and salt.

In another family, there is this youngest daughter being nicknamed "Ah Nee" which is Ant. Another family nicknamed the eldest three boys "Saw Chai", "Chu Chai" and "Kel Chai" which mean crazy kid, little piglet and little puppy. The eldest son of yet another family was nicknamed "Dongkui" which is the Chinese herb.

In that era, the adults believed that kids were prone to "disturbance" by ghosts or evil spirits resulting frequent illnesses or accidents. One way to avoid this is to give the kids "non-human" names such as names of animals, things or objects. With these nicknames, the ghosts or evil spirits would not be able to identify them as humans and so by-pass them without causing trouble. However, not all kids are given "non-human" nicknames. The healthy ones or those hardly encountered accidents would be called in their normal given names or more pleasant nicknames. When I was much older, I began to find this illogical - Could ghosts and evil spirits be so stupid that they could only hear and not see?

Of course there were kids given nicknames not because of the reason mentioned earlier but out of the affection and love of the parents. Some kids were offered a few nicknames to choose from and would be called by the choice chosen. Of course, some nicknames were given simply for fun or even ridicule. Among my primary school classmates, I have friends being called "Suitong" or water container, "Hamchenpiang" or Chinese deep-fried pancake, "Ma tel" or horse head, "Benfook" or flying fox and the list goes on.

In my family back then, the eldest boy was given a nickname but this was later changed when he was a teenager as suggested by the medicine man as a way to overcome his illness. The second son however is called by his given name. In my case, I was given a nickname which I discovered much older later on to be similar to one of my uncles' nickname. The only difference is the pitch. My mother told me that this was given to me because I liked the sound of it. 

To digress a little, I am the only one of the six siblings that a two-character given name rather than the standard three-character was inscribed on my birth certificate. Though I never got confirmation from my parents, I had the feeling that my parents were somehow very certain of having a daughter as a third child and therefore failed to think of a boy's name prior to the birth. The name was then an afterthought and as a consequence, I have to live with an alias all the rest of my life!

Years later when I was a teenager, I found nicknames to be dehumanizing and I was determined to free myself from being called by my nickname. It reached a point when I decided to stop responding whenever my nickname was called and this led to a severe confrontation with my mother. After that bitter incident, I was no longer called by my nickname. From that point, I also pledged never to give any dehumanizing nickname to any of my kids.

Of course, calling of nicknames to reflect the affection of parents as well as grandparents for their kids and grandkids continues..........You can hear the likes of "Boyboy", "Taitai", "Didi", "Ah Paul, "Ah Sam" ............

Nicknames will live on.

There Must be More than Just Admitting Your Inadequacy

Recently, a friend sent me a "nice" email meant to be inspiring and encouraging. At first glance, it does seem so.

 

JUST TO LET YOU KNOW THAT IT’S CHRISTIAN REASON WEEK AND YOU SHOULD SEND THIS TO ALL BEAUTIFUL CHRISTIAN PEOPLE.

 

When I say that “I am a Christian”, I am not shouting that “I am clean living”.

I am whispering “I am lost, but now I’m found and forgiven”.

When I say “I am a Christian”, I am not trying to be strong.

I am professing that I’m weak and need His strength to carry on.

When I say “I am a Christian”, I am not bragging of success.

I am admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say “I am a Christian”, I am not claiming to be perfect.

My flaws are far too visible, but God believes I am worth it.

When I say “I am a Christian”, I still feel the sting of pain.

I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.

When I say “I am a Christian”, I am not holier than you.

I’m just a simple sinner who received God’s grace.

But, at deeper contemplation, I find the message provokes introspection.

 

I was reminded of the recent Jubilee Malaysia held on 16 September 2012 when Christians of all denominations gathered at the Sabah Sports Stadium to pray for the nation's well beings. Within the stadium, the mood of comradeship and passion to do something as a community for the nation was really invigorating!

 

Sad to say, a few days later, Daily Express carried an article of a participant of the gathering who complained about the massive traffic jam she encountered immediately after the event due to many drivers all trying to get out of the car park and refusing to give way. Such lack of courtesy and selfishness totally contradicted what the community had pledged just a few minutes ago in the stadium! 

Do we have a lesson to learn ? I do.

Remember, even Melvin Udall played by Jack Nicholson, a misanthropic, obsessive-compulsive man in the movie "As Good as It Gets" can say "You make me want to be a better man!".

Surely, there must be something in Jesus that makes one want to be a better person. Mere words are not enough to change our character if they are not backed up by action.

Life Lessons from a 2-Year Old

It has been such a long time ago when I last spent time, lived and communicated with a two-year old. Indeed, spending time with a two-year old can be both refreshing and inspiring.

When my 2-year old grandson wakes up from his sleep in the morning or afternoon nap from the crib, he would stand by the rail with his hands outstretched and utter "Carry! Carry!" Of course, he would not be disappointed. That's "Trust".

Sometimes in the midst of watching his TV program and for no apparent reason, he would get up, go and grasp his toy guitar and then pass the toy tambourine to his grandpa. With his little hands "strumming" the guitar and jumping, he yells "Dancing ! Dancing !". That's "Hang Loose and Enjoy Life to Its Fullest".

In the children playground, he would hit his palm on the sand to create an imprint and then yell with such enthusiastic joy "Hand! Hand!". That's "Happiness can be Found in the Least Expected Simple Things".

Sometimes, in the midst of playing all his toys and making merry, he would suddenly stop and say "TV! TV!". The TV is then turned on and he is then totally focused to it. That's "Sometimes, You Have to Stop from All the Business in Life and Focus on What is Really Important!".

When he finally succeeds in making a deposit in the potty after numerous attempts, he would yell with his two hands raised "Hooray! Hooray!". That's "Celebrate when You have Achieved What You Set Out to Do".

Occasionally, he would run to grandpa holding his only Chinese book and pass on urging "Bubbles! Bubbles!". He wants to turn to the page showing a young boy chasing the many little bubbles blew up by the mother. That's "Creating Beautiful Memories that Last a Lifetime!".

Sometimes, when the adults are busy preparing stuff on the kitchen table and he is too short to have a view of the activities, he would call up, "See! See!" and he would be carried and offered the view. That's "Sometimes, Things in Life Will Not be Given to You in a Plate, You have to Ask, Demand and even Issue Ultimatum!".

He loves to drink from a water bottle though this is not encouraged for a 2-year old. When he finishes, he would ask "Some More! Some More!". That's "Don't Give Up when Opportunity is Still Available!".

When grandpa held onto the trolley just in case he might not be able to handle it. He would push grandpa's hand away from the trolley and say "No! No!". That's "There is a Time When You have to Learn to Let Go".

Sigh & Moan

AW, one of the greatest entertainers of the music world with his iconic song, Moon River chose to communicate to the world with a single word via twitter on 23 September 2012 "Sigh", 2 days before he died of bladder cancer aged 84.

Interestingly, his ashes after the cremation were sprinkled in an artificial waterway called "Moon River" at his theatre in Branson.

Did  he finally remember what the Psalmist said in Psalm 90:9, "For all our days have dwindled away in your fury; we have finished our years like a sigh."